Tonight,

You're MINE.

My Kenna Monster <3

<3Makenna Janae, August 21, 2007<3



My 2-year-old babygirl is such a character! I just love her so much, and nights like tonight, when I get some alone time with her, are sooo much fun. I get to see what a crazy little monster she is, and I absolutely love it. :)



I can't believe how fast she's growing up. It seems like just yesterday she was my tiny little baby.





She has a smile that will brighten your day, no matter what is going on! (trust me!!)



Sometimes, though, she can really live up to her nickname, KennaMonster...



...but then she flashes that grin and dimple,



...and you can't help but to laugh and fall in love with her all over again :)



She is finally out of her crib, and has slept in her new big girl bed 3 nights in row, and has done so well!! I'm so proud of her :)



She has completed my life like I never thought possible, and I am so very thankful for my precious little girl.



I love you Makenna Janae!!!!



Love, Mommy :)

Bahhh Humbug! .....just kidding. :)

My sister was the first one to mention it, and then last night Kristyn brought it up…and then this morning I read Evonne’s blog…..

HOLIDAYS.

(Jaws music playing in the background)

This year has FLOWN by. I think it’s honestly been the fastest year of my life! (Which is OOOOK by me! I’m ready for it to be over :) )

At first I was dreading the holidays this year. I actually shed a tear thinking about them. Last year I was a newly wed planning our first Huggins’ holiday season…we took a family trip to pick out our Christmas tree, we hosted Christmas Eve at our house….Santa left snowy foot prints coming out of the fireplace and the kids opened a huge box to find their very own new cat inside! Last year was what I wanted every year to be like going forward. (minus the cat)

This year, I live in an apartment with barely enough room for the kids and I, let alone a family gathering… this year I don’t know how I’m going to get a tree home in my car, and this year there is no fireplace for Santa to come down.

But, relax, that’s the worst part of this post. Because I decided to make myself a list of why this year, the holidays will be amazing! :)

1. I was sad about having no fireplace, but that’s ONLY because I forgot to remember that Santa has a magic key that fits into ANY door and lets him right in! DUH. Snowy footprints are comin our way!!

2. Small apartment= Inexpensive and EASY to decorate! Woohooo!

3. This year, we get to adopt a Charlie Brown tree!!! We’re basically helping a little runt tree earn his wings and that makes me feel pretty darn good. And plus, small tree= easy to get home, AND less of those annoying pine needles to find around the house throughout the whole next year.

4. I may be single, but instead of being sad about not having a husband to shop for, I suddenly realized that I will get to buy more ridiculous (but super cool) toys for my kids instead, who appreciates presents more anyway! AND…. I won’t get any complaints if I decide to save up some money and buy them something that will make them smile on Christmas morning but will be left in the closet after that until we give it to Goodwill. Because, after all, it’s all about first impressions anyway! Who cares about what happens after that! :)

5. When I coordinate holiday outfits this year, they can be as GIRLY as I want, (and oh they WILL be girly) and I will not have to worry about finding some yucky boy color to blend in and match.

6. Speaking of girly, I just decided that this year, we WILL have the pink themed Christmas tree I’ve always dreamed of. Oh yes we will.

7. No hosting at my house=no crazy hours of cleaning up! Enough said.

8. Kristyn and I decided to bake this year (because we are all down like the economy fo sho) and so we are planning on a PJ-wearing-cookie-baking night with the kids! I’m so excited. Baked goods for everyone instead of gifts, can’t really complain about that!

9. My nephew will be here. I am so stinkin excited I can barely wait!!!!

10. Helloooo....this economy is bringing out the best sales EVERYWHERE...yesssss.:)

11. And last but DEFINITELY not least, when I start to get in one of those yucky moods where I’m about to throw myself a huge pity party, I realize that the thing that will always remain the same every year for the holidays no matter what my situation is, is that I have my babies to hold and my friends and family to love and laugh with and enjoy. And that’s really all I can ever hope for.

The holidays are quickly approaching, and I say... Bring it on!!! :)

<3

Thankful Thursday :)

Last night Maddie came and slept with me on the couch. I didn't get much sleep because she's an all-over-the-place sleeper, but it was so nice to have her there. And then this morning, while I was getting ready for work, Kenna woke up and wanted to go lay with her sissy for a bit. So I laid back down on the couch and cuddled with both of my girls, and for a half a minute it was quiet and comfy...

and perfect.

And then Makenna wanted to play and I realized I was going to be late for work.

:)

Thank you God for my girls. :)

Lunch Break

Yummmmmmy. :)

I Got a Feeling

I thought that I was going to get on here and rant and complain.... but I just really can't find those fighting words.

I thank God for another lesson learned. I thank God for letting me listen to my instincts for once and not give up on myself.

And I even thank you, jerk. For a short time I was happy and although it wasn't real, it helped! I feel better, I feel good and I feel strong. I feel sorry as well, but all I can do is hope for the best for your situation.

As for me, I'm back on track to fixing my life and getting somewhere. And it's time to kick it into high gear! I applied for school today! I'm so excited to go back. I'm really going to do it this time, nothing is going to stop me. That 5 year plan.... ohh it's happening. :)

Girls, trust your gut. Even if what you're doing feels great, if you have that one little ounce of "weirdness"....trust it! :)

Psalm 121:

2 My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

3 He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;

5 The LORD watches over you—
the LORD is your shade at your right hand;

7 The LORD will keep you from all harm—
he will watch over your life;

8 the LORD will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.

<3

Fresh out of Bible Study.

Ephesians 22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.


25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: 30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. 31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. 32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.

This is what happens when I leave work early!!

Sooo, I left early for a doctor appointment yesterday....and LOOK what I missed!!!!!


That's right, that's Mr P Diddy himself! He came to us to introduce his new vodka Ciroc. I can't believe I missed it!! :(

I took care of that though!!!





;) Happy Friday!!!

Because I can't sleep...thinking about tomorrow!!

Dear Maddie Michelle

I cannot believe you start Kindergarten tomorrow!!! I clearly remember holding you when we first brought you home from the hospital and crying because I thought about how fast time is going to fly, and you will soon be 5 years old and in school. And here it is....your big day!!



You are the most amazing person I have ever met. Everything about you amazes me and makes me so proud! You are so smart and so pretty. You are the sweetest little girl! Last night when I was sick, I was sooo lucky to have you there to take care of me. You have such a loving heart and I admire that about you. You are the best big sister! No matter what Kenna does, you are so gentle and understanding with her. You have the patience that I pray for.

We have been through alot together in your big 5 years....and I just hope you know that I have done everything I can to give you the best that I can. I don't know what I would have done without you throughout everything! We make an awesome team, and you keep me going! :)



I am so proud of you and can't wait to hear all about your first day of school. I won't lie, I'm TERRIFIED!!! I wish I could keep you in my little bubble forever!!! But it's time for you to start your long and exciting and sometimes tough educational career, and I know you will succeed!! You are so strong and oh so smart! You will do great things! Things won't always be easy, but know that your family is behind you and here for you no matter what! And never forget what you always tell me... God is bigger than anything, and loves you more than anyone!!! You will be just fine! :)

I love you and your sister more than life itself! I know that as you two grow she will look up to you, and you'll be a great role model! You already have such a good head on your shoulders!



Good luck at school. This is the beginning of something wonderful, and I can't wait for your journey to start!



I love you Maddie Bear!

<3 Love, Mama

Madison's Big Day: Part 1

Today Madison (kinda) started school!!! I say "kinda" because her REAL first day is Wednesday, but today Tim dropped her off at the before/after school program so that she can get to used to it before her big day. She's just so grown up!!!


I didn't get to be there today to drop her off because I'm taking Wednesday off instead for her actual first day, so I was bummed I missed it! But her daddy did a good job and gave me the run down on how it all went. He said she was really strong and didn't cry like we thought she would, but that he could tell she was so nervous because she wouldn't stop talking! lol




[[ daddy did her hair :) ]]

I'm so worried about her but I'm trying to just relax. I can't believe my baby is growing up!!! :(

poundage!

Happpy Fridayyyyy!!!!

Safeway has a company-wide program going right now called Live Healthy America. We formed teams and set weight loss and activity goals within those teams, and have been working since early May to reach our goals. I started the program weighing in at 132lbs, which is the highest I've ever been not pregnant! My goal was to reach 125lbs by the time the program ends at the end of August.

I am sooo excited to report.... today I weigh in at 121LBS!!!!! yayyyy I'm so happy!! I hope I can keep it off! I've been eating alot better, and have been taking my kids on tons of walks...and it's really paying off. I feel great too! I really hope I stick to it. :)

My new favorite meal....Special K cereal with chocolate in it! MMMMMM Love. ha

What's your favorite healthy BUT delicious food??

Happy Friday everyone!
<3

I hate comcast...

But they are the cheapest cable around. Do I swallow my pride and un-cancel my order???

I do miss The Secret Life and Hannah Montana. Ughhh.

Happy Thursday, almost FRIDAYYYY!!!!!!! :):)

Refreshed!

Yesterday after work, it was Maddie and I on our own. Makenna was with her dad again. So I decided to take Maddie on a little walk. She rode in the stroller because she was super tired and grumpy and didn't really feel like going for a walk. But I couldn't be cooped up in that apartment, so off we went.

We ended up walking for about an hour and a half, down all the main streets in Tracy. I couldn't stop! It felt so good to keep going. We walked by our old house, we walked by friends houses...we just kept going. I had alot of time to think on that walk, and boy did I need that. I thought about everything that's going on in my life, and instead of being sad, for the first time in a long time, I was simply thankful. I felt so lucky to be able to walk that far, to have my daughter with me, to have another babygirl that I'll get to spend time with tonight, to have a tiny but safe little apartment to come home to, to have a second (well maybe third lol) chance. It feels good.

We got home and ate dinner, I gave Mad a bath and put her to bed watching the Jonas Brothers :) And I put in a movie I had rented called Rachel Getting Married. I had never heard of it, but it looked kind of appealing to me in the Redbox rental at work, so I decided to give it a try.

I fell asleep within the first 5 or 10 minutes lol, but I woke up to a scene where Kim, the troubled sister, was at a rehab meeting, and she was repeating that familiar prayer, "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

Oh how that hit my heart! I turned off the movie, said a little prayer, and went to bed happy!

I feel good that I am getting another chance at happiness. That I am ok. That my girls and I are making it through this, and that hopefully we will only be happier in the future. There will be tough times ahead, but oh will there be good amazing wonderful times as well!!! :)

I feel so refreshed :)

Funtastic Fridayyy

First order of business... Can someone teach me how to follow people on here!? LOL I'm blogger challenged. Thanks!

Happy Friday!!!

I'm adjusting to my "new" life I guess I could say. Last night I didn't have my girls, they had daddy time. I also have no cable yet...AND my kenna monster destroyed my laptop! So I couldn't bear the thought of staying home! I went to Target and shopped for the 3 birthdays we are going to this weekend... and then I picked up Taco Bell and ate dinner with one of my bestestes in her break room at work! We talked about some fun summer plans and it made me so excited!

It's so weird to have freedom sometimes now. I dont know what to do with myself! But it's kind of refreshing. I'm so sad when I don't have my girls with me, but all I can do is make the best of it.

So, in a couple weeks I'm going to Sacramento for the weekend! That should be fun. And in October a trip to Vegas!! I'm excited. :)

I'm so blessed. I have amazing friends who will not allow me to stay down! I love them. And my sister and I can make each other laugh no matter whats going on. My daughters can be monsters but gosh I love them so much it hurts sometimes! I really am so very lucky, and I am so blessed to be able to see that again.

Happy Friday!!! Let me in on some Bloggin Wisdom pllllease!!!! :)


"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight."
Proverbs 3:5-6

New Day, Fresh Start!

Gooood morning!

Happy almost Friday! wooohooo!! How amazing is this weather?! Normally we'd be frying and crying, but today we can talk a walk in the perfect weather without even melting!! (After I'm off work and in the outside world of course!)

I'm trying to get used to my new apartment, and it's getting easier with each day. My biggest complaint... noisey neighbors above me!!! Ugh! I wake up to squeaky footsteps and closing doors all night long!

My favorite thing so far... the pool...and since the apartment is smaller than I'm used to, its easier to keep clean..and also my new and unexpected favorite... Yesterday Makenna and I took a walk to the on site laundry to wash some clothes, and it was not even half as bad as I thought it would be! Makenna loved the "adventure" of getting there, she pushed her little doll in the stroller, and even helped me pick up any stray laundry that fell ont he way.

I was able to wash two loads at a time instead of one, so i got it done so much faster!

I was so scared about not having my own washer and dryer here...but after my first laundry room experience, I think I'll be just fine! :)

Good things to come!

But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. "Do not fear what they fear ; do not be frightened."
1 Peter 3:14